Tagged: Meme-o-the-Day

ChemMom tagged me which gives me a convenient excuse not to have to think this morning. Here goes:

Four jobs I've had in my life:
1. Stay-at-home Mom
2. Marketing Coordinator
3. Middle School Art Teacher
4. Just about every single job you can have at a resort/restaurant (chambermaid, laundress, cocktail waitress, bellhop, asst. garde manager (cold food prep), food server, hostess, bus girl, dishwasher)

Four movies I can watch over and over:
1. Breakfast Club
2. The Fifth Element
3. Braveheart
4. Slingblade

Four places I have lived:
1. Tampa, FL
2. St. Louis, MO
3. Lake Forest, IL
4. Nantucket, MA

Four TV shows I love to watch:
1. CSI
2. Bones
3. House
4. Scrubs

Four places I have been on vacation:
1. Belize
2. Budapest
3. Rome
4. Stockholm

Four of my favorite dishes:
1. My mom's Leg of Lamb
2. Mexican anything
3. Massaman Gai from Sukhothai
4. Lechon Asado from Habana Cafe

Four websites I visit daily:
1. Delphi
2. Google
3. Gmail
4. too many blogs to name

Four places I would rather be right now:
1. In Florida with my mom (only two weeks!)
2. Somewhere peaceful with the BWB and no kids
3. In a spa getting a full day of pampering
4. In a comfy chair reading a book with no interrupyion

Four bloggers I'm tagging:
1. VG
2. Mommy D
3. 007
4. Random Muse (because she has lots of free time)

Inner Peace and the Outer Beast

OK, so I've been taking yoga for a few weeks now, and really enjoy it. It does wonders for my frame of mind and my aching back, as well as giving me a nice easy transition back into the world of exercising. In today's class, I learned a very important lesson. My Powerhouse is a Tinyshed. The instructor schooled us on the four abdominal groups that make up the Powerhouse, here's what I've learned about mine:

Diaphragm: No thanks, I have an IUD.
Upper Abs: Only thing keeping me from resembling Neanderthal man
Lower Abs: Um, I think they're on vacation.
Pelvic Floor: I'm pretty sure I left that at the hospital after Gertie's birth.

Conclusion: I.am.weak.

I try and immerse myself in the calming spirit of yoga and know that my strength will come with time. I concentrate on my breathing, in through the nose, out through the mouth, but, sometimes I have a hard time focusing on my breathing because I'm more focused on the older chubby woman in the mirror who keeps staring at me. It's beginning to make me a bit uncomfortable, I mean I know I'm kind of flabby and have a hard time with some of the poses, but sheesh, how rude. Then I realize that's me. Sigh.

Just stick with it, right? I didn't get weak, and fat, and old overnight. Or maybe I should just go do this. Voila, problem solved. Namaste.

Stolen From Rude Cactus

Ten Top Trivia Tips about Professional Slacker!

1. Professional Slacker will always turn right when leaving a cave.
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Consult the Contrivium I am interested in Do tell me about herhimitthem

A New Woman

Shhh, my baby is falling asleep by 10pm. That might not seem early to some people, but after three months of not getting to go to sleep before at least 11:30pm and often not until well after midnight, I'm doing my own personal little happy dance. And this shift to an earlier bed time has thus far not interfered with how long she is sleeping--until I wake her up around 8am (please don't hate me Beth & HG). I've been in desperate need of sleep, the toll three small children has taken on my temperment is quite large. I have been snappish, easily frustrated and overwhelmed often in the last several months. I feel bad for my kids who've had to bear the brunt of my moodiness. But, everything looks better after 8 hrs of sleep--even if nothing else has changed. I hope that sleep in addition to the yoga class I'm taking helps keep me centered and more calm so I can be a better mom, wife, person.

The ABCs of IUDs

Because I know you all want to hear me talk about my nether regions as much as possible, I thought I'd fill you in on my OB/Gyn appointment yesterday.

Since I might seriously claw my own eyes out were I to get pregnant again anytime soon AND my husband would enjoy the occasional roll in the hay, I had to figure out some method of birth control that was easy, effective, not permanent and easy. Because if it's hard, there will be no rolling. So, options:

• Pill--nursing still, mini pill sucks and did I mention that I get just a teeny bit MENTAL on the pill? That last tidbit effectively knocks out the patch and nuvaring as well.
• Diaphragm--um, yeah, just no. Because if I really want a barrier method, I'll take the one where clean up is the male counterpart's problem.
• Condoms--Burning rubber smell, nuff said.
• IUD--hmmm, removable, very low dose hormone, always in place. Ding Ding Ding, we have a winner.

At my annual well women, I discuss this with my OB and he says OK, just set up an appt, we do it in office and be sure to take some ibuprofen before you come in. So, yesterday I go in and pass the kids off to the BWB, who kindly took off work early to help me out. Because yeah, just imagine the fun post I'd have for you if I had to do an IUD insertion with three kids in the room. Picture this: GB, PUT THE IUD BACK ON THE TABLE! DB, DO NOT STAND BEHIND THE DR. AND ASK WHAT HE'S DOING TO MOMMY! Gertie: WAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! Loads of fun.

I go back into the room and start undressing. Ahhh, a doctor's appointment with no kids, bliss. I can lay back on the table, rela...IS THAT A SYRINGE?? That's most definitely a SYRINGE. No one said anything about shots. No no, no shots in the nether regions, through three deliveries I never had to get a shot in the tweeter. Oh a needle in the spine is just fine, but in the CERVIX? WHILE I'M AWAKE? No way.

Of course now I'm nervous, the thought of someone sticking a needle in my cervix has me ready to get dressed and walk right back out of that room. "Sorry honey, we just can't ever have sex again, they wanted to stick a needle in my cervix." And you know what, the BWB would understand, because he.hates.needles, HATES.NEEDLES. So I sit there and fret, and feel queasy, and try to visualize something pleasant, but that needles is pointing at me, saying hey, I'm going to stick it to ya! And I'm pacing. Finally, after what must have been 3 hours (10 minutes) my OB comes in and asks how I'm doing.

Me: unitelligiblegobbeltygookNEEDLEwhinenervous.
OB: *laughing* You? Nervous? I don't think I've ever seen you nervous.
Me: I didn't know I was going to have to get a shot, in my nether regions.
OB: Well when you see the instrument I use to grab your cervix, you can tell me if you still want the shot. *pulls out pair of scissorlike pinchers that must have been 8 ft long*
Me: I'll have the shot thankyouverymuch.
OB: I thought you might say that.

Now, I have to tell you that I simply adore my OB, he's probably 3 yrs older than I am, super funny and always can make me feel better about things. So, here I am in stirrups with the speculum in place and he goes to the table to grab (eeek the needle!) the betadine wipes. He sterilizes the area and reaches for (eek! the needle!) more betadine wipes. This is where he stops and looks over the sheet at me.

OB: A.K., try to relax, you keep clenching up your buttcheeks every time I reach to the table.
Me: *nervous laugh* yeah, I'm going to shoot that speculum right out of my crotch.
OB: That would bad, then I'd have to explain to all my buddies how I got a black eye. "See there was this patient, and she was nervous and started laughing, and shot a speculum right out of her vagina."
Me: *laughing harder, going to make his tale a reality*
OB: My partner says he can do this without grabbing the cervix, but I'm just not confident that it will go into the right place, do you want me to try anywa..
Me: YES PLEASE!!!!
OB: OK, here we go *inserting IUD* Huh, well, I guess you can do it without grabbing the cervix. Any cramping?
Me: Not yet, I hardly felt anything. Thankyouverymuchforlettingmebeyourguineapig!

So, other than cramping most of the night last night, this was a really easy procedure. I think the best part was when I got to tell the BWB (who is easily skeeved) that he might be able to feel the strings the first couple times we have sex. Heee, I think I just got out of wifely duties for a month.

Pretty Darn Proud of Myself

OK, from past experience, you would think the Slacker family would immediately hire someone to install anything we purchase for our house, right? WRONG! See we don't learn from our mistakes, we enjoy repeating them, repeatedly.

Yesterday, we went out and purchased a ceiling fan to replace the one in our great room. It's a super awesome fan with a dual lighting system and a remote control. Did I mention this ceiling fan is to be installed on the cathedral ceilings in our great room, like 15 ft off the floor, with one of those long pole thingies? Yeah, this ought to be fun. The poor BWB actually has to take a greater role in this due to the height issue, and he just LOVES working with electricity. To make things even more interesting, we ran into the same problem as when we installed the bedroom fan--three wires coming from the ceiling, two wires coming from the fan remote sensor. Well, having MUCH experience with wiring after the last ceiling fan fiasco, I knew that I had to cap off the red wire at the ceiling and the switch, no problem. Well, until I take the switchplate off and pull the switch out and see that the red wire is attached to the switch and well, if I simply cap it off, the switch won't work. And to complicate matters, there is not only one switch at the wall plate, but three, a single pole switch that flips up and down, and a set of switches that flip side to side (one of which we've never discerned a purpose for). So, ok, lots of wire connected and piggybacked to both switches, weeeee. But, being the experienced electrician that I am (or more truly just not wanting to be without light for a week until someone can come fix what I break) I take digital pictures of all wiring before disconnecting anything, that way I can just put it all back together when on the 12th try the new fan still won't spin.

Oh, did I also not mention that NO instructions came with the fan. Uh huh, just wingin' it, yup, I can do that. I've put together a fan before, how hard can it be? It's ok when there's only one piece leftover that I couldn't figure out, right? Actually, the BWB did have to return to Lowes to get a smaller pole (het, pole, yes I'm 12), and returned with a set of instructions which I only sort of needed a little.

And here's where the story gets boring. I studied the wall wiring, figured out where all the wires went, capped off the red, took the black wire off the mystery switch and put in onto the switch that controlled the fan. I was very confident this would work. I then wired the remote to the fan and BWB wired it to the ceiling. I attached the fan blades, put the lighting together and turned the power back on. I flipped the switch and....nothing. Oops, I probably need to use the remote. I press a button and....nothing. BWB suggests that maybe batteries in the remote would help. Ah yes, that might be important--search everywhere for a 9 volt, put it in the remote, press a button, and....LIGHT!! FAN MOVEMENT!! I did it, the first try, holy crap. Can you tell that I'm a bit pleased with myself?

So now, we have this lovely fan hanging in our great room:

You Know You Live In Missouri When...

Yesterday I picked the eldest up from daycare, drove through McD's and went to the park because it was so beautiful outside. It was in the 60s and sunny. Today? We had to don our parkas to venture out to the store in the raging blizzard. Gotta love being the bermuda triangle of weather.

I'm It...

HG tagged me and I can't let my fellow mom o' three down!

The first player of this game starts with the topic "five weird habits I have" and people who get tagged then write an entry about their five weird habits as well as state this rule clearly. In the end, you need to choose the next five people to be tagged and link to their web journals. Don't forget to leave a comment in their blog or journal that says you have been tagged? (assuming they take comments) and tell them to read yours.

1. I tickle, poke, and pester my husband as a sign of affection, often past the point of cute and funny to seriously annoying, but I can't help myself, I get this incessant need to do it.
   
2. I get supremely irritated when people misuse less/fewer whereas I can't not say something about it if it's on tv/radio/print media and really have to bite my tongue not to correct people when they get it wrong.
   
3. I rub my feet together when I'm trying to fall asleep. I don't know how it started or why it continues, but I've noticed my eldest doing it too.
   
4. I have food texture issues, I can't eat things like tapioca pudding or cottage cheese because it just feels to weird in my mouth. In more food weirdness, I will take a bite of chocolate and then eat a pretzel or chip because I really love the sweet/salty taste combo.
   
5. I have an unhealthy fascination with watching shows about surgery and human deformities. I can watch Discovery Health all day.

I tag: Rude Cactus, VG, Mel, LisaM and Kelley

Delurk you!

I know I have had a rough year when it comes to blogging. There have been rather large gaps in my writing, mostly due to lack of time or anything interesting to talk about. So, a big thank you to my regular readers, I appreciate you sticking around. For those of you that have been silent all this time, here's your chance to shout out and let me know who are.

A Facelift

I was bored with the old template.

Just.Can't.Win

I like sleep. Sleep is good, it helps me regenerate and I really need to regenerate after a day with three small children. So, why is it that when you need the most sleep is when you get the least? Whoever worked out this young children/sleep ratio really screwed up.

Anyway, the girlchild transitioned to the crib relatively well. She had a couple of bad nights, and still stayed up fairly late, but we got rid of the whole boob in mouth=only way to sleep thing. Yay us! But (big but) girlchild in crib means middle child in big brother's room in twin bed. That, is not going quite as well. First, there will be no napping in big boy bed. Freedom is much too, um, free for GB. So, I still put him in the crib for naps because he really really NEEDS the nap and so do I. Night time actually went fairly well the first two days. We put him in bed earlier than DB and he went to sleep. Sneaky little bastard figured that trick out and now waits up for his brother so he can cause mischief. For an hour after we put them to bed there is giggling, yelling, and the invetible falling out of bed. And even when there is silence, the night isn't over as GB has reverted to waking up multiple times a night. How is it fair that my three month old is sleeping through but my 21 mo old is up at midnight at 4am. Sigh.

Poor DB, he's being a trooper through the whole thing, but he did ask me this morning if when we get a new house, he can have his own room again.

Proud of Myself

Since my last post:

I went to a yoga class at the gym
I've cooked dinner both nights
Gertie slept in her crib and not my bed (not that this was easy or fun)

But I also just bought up half a shelf of Choxie stuff at Target since it was so so so cheap.

Welcome to Reality

The reality that I'm a SAHM of three small children. It's official, everyone currently residing in my house aside from me now has a full time (out of the house) job, leaving me to fend for myself for real. Darn them, how could they do this to me? ;)

It started off rough between staying up to watch the Orange Bowl until after midnight--it went to triple OT (GO PENN STATE) if you didn't watch, then trying to pacify my night owl daughter who decided she had not yet reached her sleepy point, THEN getting up with a nightmare laden toddler who screamed intermitently until 2am. Add, some evil person calling at 6:30am and hanging up and then having to rush around to get everyone dressed and out of the house for DB's first day back at preschool including the dog who had to be dropped off at the groomer and I'm just teeny weeny itty bitty bit INSANE. Then I went to the QT, got some coffee and managed to open my eyes more than 1/4 of the way. Honestly, the rest of the day hasn't been as bad thanks to McDonalds drive through, and 1,2,3 kids that decided to nap simultaneously (yay me).

But, this does have me thinking about what I need to change so I don't feel like a chicken sans head.

First, and most importantly, I need to get the girlchild moved out of my bed and get her to fall asleep for the night before tomorrow's arrival. This will be my biggest challenge, but also brings the largest payoff. Sleep does wonders for my, well, everything.

Next, I need to use the gym membership that I just purchased. They have free babysitting--no excuses! This should help with my energy level as well as my midsection. (the 3rd pregnancy was not at all kind to my belly)

Three, meal planning, that's something I've always aspired to do and failed miserably at.

Step 4: Work on grammar skills (see above sentence).

Now if this is like every other new years type resolution making, then I'll be sitting on the couch within a couple of weeks with my pint of hagen daas watching Judge Judy, but until then, there is hope for a more organized me (right?).

Well That's Over, Part Two

So, yeah, HAPPY NEW YEAR, and as my mom said, it can only get better from here, right?

After feeling pretty out of sorts last week thanks to some family strife, I was looking forward to some fun stuff we had planned last week. First, BWB was going to be off work for five whole days, a rare thing to have him home that long when we aren't leaving town. So, we decided to tackle some projects. In the midst of cleaning out the garage on Thursday I got a rather hysterical call from my SIL who told me that her house had caught fire and the garage was burned out. So, we all jumped in the car and headed over, to find her husband and the fire dept milling around outside. Thankfully, the damage was mostly from soot, something smoldered in there all morning, but never caught anything else on fire. Otherwise, we would have had a rather full house with 2 sets of ILs living with us. Insurance covered everything and sent them to a hotel until a cleaning crew could come in and take care of all the soot. One crisis solved. We even made it to our euchre night with one of Jason's coworkers and had a really nice time.

We arrived home around midnight and tried to get the wee girl to go to sleep. Yeah, no such luck, not until about 2am. Around 3:30am, I hear DB yelling out in the living room. He was calling for my BIL because he didn't think we were home. Come to find out the poor guy has thrown up next to his bed. Joy. Nothing like cleaning up puke in the middle of the night. We get things as cleaned up as possible and put him back to bed, he comes in again at 5am and pukes next to our bed. UGH. I love the smell of vomit in the morning. So, now we're scrubbing our carpet, and the girlchild has woken up and is fussy, let's just say long bad night. DB does go back to sleep, but GB wakes up around 7am and BWB gets up while I sleep with the girlchild. I wake up at 9am and we switch and he goes back to bed until noon. DB throws up a few more times, but really he is the best sick kid, he doesn't complain or cry, just sits quietly.

Now we're thinking it's time to cancel plans with our friends who were coming over with their two boys for NYE. We didn't get a hold of them until late, and find out that their boys had already been through the stomach flu earlier in the week. So, yay, they're still coming. Friday is pretty easy, we rest up and hang out with the kiddos.

Saturday everyone seems much better and we spend the day getting the house in order. Damn, it looked nice. We end up having over both sets of SIL/BILs and our friends and their two boys. We ate a ton of munchies, hung out around the fire pit and drank wine and then gorged ourselves on ribs, NY strips, chicken breasts and brats with scalloped potatoes. I don't think anyone left the table hungry. We get the older boys set up with a movie and put the younger boy to bed and go back out by the fire. Through the monitor I hear GB crying, but since my SILs are both upstairs, I figure one of them will check on him. Yeah, poor SIL who decided to go got her first dousing with vomit. GB now has the flu and has christened my SIL, next to his bed and the hall carpet. More steam cleaning. We decided to come inside and play poker until midnight so BWB could hold GB. He was a trooper too and really only threw up three times or so and then was asleep for the night. DB went to bed around 11pm, and got up once to tell us he'd thrown up all over his bed (sheet change #72), we got him cleaned up and threw him in the other bed while I got the wash going.

We turned on the tv around 11:50 and watched some bands play, only to find out that we were on the wrong channel for the countdown and missed it by a minute, ahh, story of my life. ;) Everyone left around 1am, and we said screw cleaning until the morning and headed for bed ourselves. Miss Gert was actually pretty cooperative and fell asleep quickly.

Unfortunately, the plague had not yet left us. Poor DB was up in the middle of the night and didn't quite make it to the toilet with a case of the scoots. More cleaning. I have to give BWB credit for doing most of the middle of the night stuff. I felt really out of it, just figuring I was tired, but lo and behold, who wakes up pukey Sunday morning, yes, that would be me. I spent all day in bed or on the couch alternately sipping gingerale and clearing out my stomach. Boy do I love the flu. Again, poor BWB who was so exhausted he could barely keep his eyes open still had to take kid duty all day, even to the point of bring Gertie to me so I could nurse her, as I just felt too weak to pick her up myself. Sigh.

Thankfully, we got to bed last night around 10:45 and slept until 5am when first Gertie woke up to nurse and then a horrendous stormed rolled through setting off the tornado sirens--yes, in the middle of winter! The boys slept until 8am when I got up and BWB got to sleep in until 10am. I can't begin to tell you how thankful I am that he's off work today, so he can get some rest. I'm feeling quite well, I can't believe how quickly the bug comes and gos. But, after heading downstairs to check my email for the first time in three days, I see poor BIL on the couch asking if I have any pepto, the next victim of the plague...